The Dance

Sometimes it only takes one lose thread to unravel a whole ball of yarn. Never fails, when it happens it seems like there are loose threads EVERYWHERE. A friend made a comment recently, as a sort of "excuse" for why he wasn't doing something, then he laughed and said, of his "job"..."Well, it's not like even THAT is real work". It doesn't matter that this person works in the computer industry ten to twelve hours a day, sometimes seven days a week, and fits in being a part-time single parent as well. When I pointed out that most people would consider this work and a fairly heavy load he just scoffed. "It's easy. I type stuff in and the computer gets busy for awhile. It's not like anyone's going to die because I did the job or not, and I'm not picking up anything heavy. I've WORKED before and this job ain't work."

Now I keep seeing this commercial for Ford trucks. Starts out with a cowboy looking guy sitting on the back of a pick-up with a guitar singing, "There's pride in his heart and dirt on his hands, there's one place to find a hard working man..."

And I keep hearing Wayne, this friend of mine back in Florida teasing me the week I worked on the Paso Fino horse farm. Teasing me, but he was serious. "It will do you good to do some WORK for a change, instead of spending hours a day on that computer." He knew the hours I was spending were all about my business, ICAT, the aerobatic training center, but that wasn't WORK. Shoveling horse shit is work. Working on the computer is NOT work.

The yarn ball started to unravel...

I suspect that inherent in many of us, is something that is "resistive" to doing a thing we love, feel passionate about, are good at, and which doesn't hurt or get you sweaty and dirty. I don't know if it's some kind of subliminal mid-western programming along the lines of: "if you ain't sweatin', it don't hurt, and you ain't dirty. It ain't work." or if it's deeper and broader than that. Something societal. In order to keep people doing something that makes them miserable you have to come up with something. Guilt. Fear. Pressure.

How better than to convince people that; "If it feels good it MUST be bad for them," and "If it's easy it MUST be lazy," and "if you WANT to do these things that make you feel good and come easily to you then by default you must be a BAD and LAZY person and you will be punished. NOW GET YOUR NOSE BACK ON THAT GRINDSTONE AND GET TO WORK."

Ah yes, the WASP work ethic.....Reminds me of the current raging debate of the recent Vermont ruling on Gay Marriage rights. Why won't anybody just SAY what the problem really is? It scares the Hell out of all the Fundamentalist Christians because it threatens their control, a control they have had for a very long time...too long...

Last night I watched a wonderful special on Michael Flaherty, the Irish dancer who was the lead in River Dance and went on to create Lord of the Dance. He said while he was in school he was always getting into trouble for "dreamin'," but the work he is doing today is what he was dreaming about then.

I can relate to that. I can remember staring out the window in junior high...making paper airplanes and sailing them out the window. Dreamin... I can remember going to the principal's office...being moved away from the window... I can also remember the first time someone I respected told me it was perfectly ok to daydream, that in fact daydreaming is a very important part of the creative process...it is a form of visualization, and the more precisely you dream what you are seeking the more likely you are to cause it to manifest in your life.

Flaherty talked about the first Traditional Irish Dance Contest he went to and how his form of dancing differed from the traditional way. He moved his arms. Not allowed. He liked to do kicks. There's a limit on those and he was over the limit. He placed last in the competition, but he didn't give up. The next year he worked harder and came in fourth, and he stayed in Ireland and studied the way they did the dance. To win the world competition he had to dance "their way". The year he won earned him the recognition and respect that eventually allowed him to break with the traditional form and create his own dream. As he told the story there was such fire in him, he is a man driven. The dream feeds him and he feeds the dream. It was...inspiring, for me. My mother had a different view. She was half-assed watching the same show while working on her Jumble. She looked up at one point in the show and said, "Why would anybody want to do that? I bet he's gay, just look at him." I found him undeniably masculine and very very sexy in a primal way. I couldn't even imagine why she would think he was gay; the man reeked of male sensuality. It isn't the first time my mother and I have had radically different points of view but this bothered me. I pondered for a minute. He's doing something he loves and feels passionate about. He is outside the mainstream of society. He is doing something she cannot do or even comprehend wanting to do. Therefore it must be bad...he must be a bad person. She is confronted with something she cannot understand, she is confronted with her own lack of courage to step outside the norm, and therefore she feels threatened and resentful. Her fear and anger causes her to condemn.

What the Flaherty has done is takes enormous amounts of time, dedication, physical abuse of the body, ...but because it was his DREAM...because he loved it, because he was inspired, it was worth it to him. Would he call it "work"? I don't know...I know it wouldn't be called a "job"....

I rather suspect that if my friend were to give up his fairly stable and lucrative computer job and start doing something as esoteric as WRITING for a living he would get much the same reaction from the mainstream of society. People DO NOT make a living writing, dancing or playing music. It's simply NOT ACCEPTABLE...REAL people don't DO those things for a living, they have REAL jobs.

A society that encourages people to believe that only things which are painful in one way or another, which are "hard", which are mind and soul numbing to creativity, which allow for no silly nonsense such as "dreamin", is not a wholesome, nurturing or happy society. It's ingrained in all of us, and it's effects are hard to spot and insidious.

We must try not to be our own disparagers, there is plenty of that everywhere. How many people are stuck in jobs they hate because they dare not pursue a dream? Dreams aren't grown-up, they are part of what we are expected to give up with our childhood. Dreams aren't responsible and they certainly aren't work. They also won't keep the WASP establishment fueled and there are a great many people on this planet who stand to lose a great deal if the unwashed masses suddenly decide to quit working and go off chasing dreams.

I say let's do. Let's chase our passions over the hill. Let's take a couple of hours each week to follow our dreams and work at our loves. When Michael Flaherty started dancing he was told he was too old to ever go far. Since then he has redefined Irish Dance and has helped bring it out of the closet and into the lives of people everywhere. And it's hard, and he sweats, and he lifts heavy things...our spirits.

-SueWolf